Process Reflects Personality

Ready, Fire, Aim

Don’t Knock It Until You’ve Tried It

Doe in the headlights? Not me. I’m one of those people who would rather drive 60 mph in the wrong direction than sit waiting for the train to pass. It’s no surprise that I began writing without an outline. Oh yeah, and being an accounting major, my last creative writing class was in fifth grade.

Square Pegs Actually DO Fit in Round Holes

A few reviewers implied that my time would be better spent diving from Harold’s plane than trying to write a novel.

What’s the hangup with the whole fitting issue? Give me the right hammer and I guarantee I can get any shaped peg to fit in any shaped hole. You just have to keep pounding. [Just in case I lost you, we are still talking about writing a novel.]

Shut up and Write

On the other hand, I never suffered writer’s block. There wasn’t a day I didn’t spring out of bed and write my brains out. Ninety thousand words printed, only seventy thousand words of outtakes. If you want backstory on any of the characters, I have it. In fact, I could literally cast an entirely new story from my outtake characters.

Brass Tacks

What’s Your Point?

Some people do market research before choosing a topic, but that wouldn’t be me, of course. A Perfect Finish presents both sides of a contentious issue–assistance-in-dying. Alamea represents those in favor, while Eddie and Harold validate the arguments against. The story realistically portrays how such debates might unfold within the context of a startup business. Contentiousness, by definition, involves dissent, and among early readers I found plenty. But writing a novel centered on a divisive social issue is, by definition, controversial, right? (please disagree).

It’s paramount to establish a clear purpose. Discuss it with others if you wish, but their agreement or disagreement won’t impact the outcome. Ultimately, the idea must resonate with yourself.

First Steps in Writing

In the context of writing a debut novel, I’ve traveled but cannot recommend the Long and winding road.

Outlines & Characters

I like writing. I enjoy creating a scene in which characters say, do, and react to funny situations. Anything can be funny, and most real things in life are so funny, you don’t even need to make up any new material. If something isn’t funny, then I’m just not observing it through the optimal lens. Looking back on my own life, some of the funniest things that happened didn’t seem so funny at the time.

In contrast, writing an outline is dull. Even so, if I had to do it over again, I would spend months frowning over an outline, tweaking it until every character had a clear purpose, every chapter had a clear point as it related to the book’s theme, every scene advanced the plot. Before writing the first paragraph, I would work out every detail of every character, building enough personality to allow them to uniquely impact .  . . blah, blah, blah.

Take a Creative Writing Course

There’s nothing funny about the process of creative writing. All the essential aspects are written into Creative Writing 101–dull as dog dirt. All that and still, no joke, if I had to do it over again, I would actually participate in a creative writing workshop before I began writing. It would have been a more pleasant way to have learned much of what I learned about my own writing deficiencies.

I started from the point, “I can do this. How hard can it be?” I progressed to the point, “Wow, I really suck, compared to these real writers.” After rounds of revisions, I finally turned the corner when I tacked on chapter 22: Co-authors: “Okay, square peg, round hole, hand me that hammer, I can do this.”

Go Around Again!

If Hanna would agree to extend my hall pass, I’m confident I could write a novel way more efficiently if I had to do it over again . . . but then, well, places to go, people to see. That brings me around to the question I’m often asked:

How much wood would a woodchuck chuck if a woodchuck could chuck wood?

  • How old is the woodchuck?
  • What does chucking wood pay?
  • What else is the woodchuck good at?
  • How does the woodchuck’s wife feel about him chucking all that wood?
  • What’s happening at home with the kids while the woodchuck is chucking all that wood?
  • What’s the deal with woodchucking vacations?
  • Who is going to chuck all that wood, if the woodchuck doesn’t chuck wood?
  • Who is gonna shovel the walks while the wood chuck is chucking all that wood?

 

Go back to: Writing A Perfect Finish